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beauty is just booty without you

by Scott McBride

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1.
Pots and pans. Sticks and stones. Coins and cans. Bricks and bones. Does she miss me? Bottles of beer. Foils of food. Trail of tears. Mending of moods. Does she miss me? I don't know. Will she kiss me? The magnet seems to think so. "Definitely" is what it says. Oh! Close the curtains. Light the letters. Open the oven. Dial the debtors. Does she miss me like I miss her?
2.
I spent my days thinking about the nape of your neck. And the kisses that I placed upon your forehead. The way the sunshine through the trees made your hair golden. And the soft summer breeze took no edge off the heat. I spent my nights thinking about your hand in mine. "This is a first" you said and flashed that soft white smile. And I realized that I would lose you. You must've realized it too. Cause the more we talked it out the more we got it confused. That's how I spent my summer. It was long and lonely. I was only waiting for hours on end for something. Anything. But the phone's not ringing. That's how I... That's how I... I spent my time wondering where the time had went. I've been trying to remember how I could forget. Everything sped up and then it slowed down again. And I was standing in the same place I was when it began. That's how I spent my summer. It was long and lonely. I was only waiting for hours on end for something. Anything. But the phone's not ringing. That's how I... That's how I...
3.
Apples in the orchard. This heat is torture. The swing's swinging empty. Your perfume on the pillow. Your clothes in a corner here. They are souvenirs. Don't you have it in your head yet darling that you just can't count on me? It's certain disaster. This day's dragged on forever. I feel like tonight will never come. And I've stared at the ceiling so long I think my eyes are going numb. Don't you have it in your head yet darling that you just can't count on me? It's certain disaster. Certain disaster. Time's moving faster. Everybody's waiting for the rainfall from the bottom of the top. From the bottom of the top. And everybody's got their eyes pointed up and they're looking for the drop. Yeah, they're looking for the drop. The only difference between flying and falling is the waiting. She said "you gotta go with what you know." So I went but she didn't follow. Oh well, just another night alone on the Gulf of Mexico. The black glass of ocean. Don't you have it in your head yet darling that you just can't count on me? It's certain disaster. Certain disaster. Time's moving faster. Towards certain disaster.
4.
We met at a party for Shelly when she came home from the Army. I was my usual self: effusive and charming. You set your gaze on me. Your stare as cold as ice. I heard you were a hard ass but you told me that you wanted to play nice. "Those melodramatic flares are better suited on them than us. And I'm sick of who I am. I just wanna be who I was" You change your tune so quick. Can't wrap my head 'round you because I just can't figure you out. A few weeks later everything just got so complicated. The girl next door turned back into the girl everybody hated. I said "what happened to the halo you stuck in your back pocket?" Didn't look up from your magazine but muttered "I had to get rid of it." "Those melodramatic flares are better suited on them than us. And I'm sick of who I am. I just wanna be who I was." You change your tune so quick. Can't wrap my head 'round you because I just can't figure you out.
5.
Put out my cigarette. Crying in the rain, don't want it getting wet. Swore I'd never do this. But somehow it's so appropriate. I don't wanna look sharp. Don't wanna stand straight. Don't wanna do nothing but lie here all day. Don't wanna go out. Don't want you to come in. I don't ever wanna have the blues again. Admit he's wrong for you. I've seen you together. Seen the way he treats you. You swear I'm even worse. Well if that's true, why do I still get those looks? I don't wanna look sharp. Don't wanna stand straight. Don't wanna do nothing but lie here all day. Don't wanna go out. Don't want you to come in. I don't ever wanna have the blues again. B - Baby L U - you left me E - it's easy S - to save me I don't wanna look sharp. Don't wanna stand straight. Don't wanna do nothing but lie here all day. Don't wanna go out. Don't want you to come in. I don't ever wanna have the blues again.
6.
Baby, I'm needy. Put your hands upon me. This party's not one 'til we're dancing in the yard. And the neighbors all wake up and the cops are in the driveway and we turn out all the lights and we hide. Baby, I'm needy. Put your hands upon me. I need a friend now and I want you around. Let's go to Mexico or Canada. Yeah, I'll take you to your car and we can talk about it there. Do you ever feel like you just want to do it all again? Everybody wants something but does something want anything? Do you ever feel like you just want to do it all again? Put that mean streak on down and put your hands upon me now.
7.
baby 03:55
Baby, I'm miserable when you're happy. But you're not happy when you're with me. I just want you to be sad again. We'd spend all our weekends dreaming of schemes we both believed in. What were you dreaming then? You said "There's safety in numbers and there's money in safety. So let's get everyone together and we'll be rich and happy." I just want you to be sad again.
8.
grabby magee 02:22
Grabby Magee picks up everything, sticks it in his mouth and keeps on moving. I tried to teach him the difference between outer space and the deep blue sea. He didn't find it too interesting but he'll learn eventually. Grabby Magee, in bed by 7.30. Wakes up at 11 for a midnight treat. I tried to teach him to say "hello" instead of "hi dude" when he answers the phone. But he's so stuck in his routine but he'll learn eventually. C'mon Grabby! Grabby Magee!
9.
I hate to think I've wasted my whole life on good intentions without any actions. And I say "Don't look back or worry now." But I can't relax with you on my mind and the wind at my back. No, I can't just sit back. I gotta move. You could take an airplane, darling. You could take a boat or train. Set out across the sea. You could find some way to move somehow. You could bring yourself to me. On the day I sent you away my head was in the clouds and the forecast called for rain. Clearly I wasn't thinking clearly like I am now. And I can't relax with your image in my retinas just waiting to attack. No, I can't just sit back. I gotta move. You could take an airplane, darling. You could take a boat or train. Set out across the sea. You could find some way to move somehow. You could bring yourself to me. I just want to do it again. Only this time I want to do everything different. The art of insincerity, I've left it behind. And I can't relax with you on my mind and the wind at my back. No, I can't just sit back. I gotta move. You could take an airplane, darling. You could take a boat or train. Set out across the sea. You could find some way to move somehow. You could bring yourself to me.
10.
I was all out breath from climbing the steps. Got upstairs just in time to see you go. I started back down but then turned around and plunked out these chords on your piano. This is the song I wrote from your second story window. I was backwards and forwards. I was in-between floors and this song I wrote from your second story window. In-between in-betweens like a nightmare from a dream. It was a sunny day but I was in a haze as I followed your car all around. You first spotted me at the light on 17th and then lost me in the maze of our downtown. So I sped towards your place and hoped you could explain why you found loving me so hard. And when I got there I thought I heard you upstairs and then I saw you running back towards your car. This is the song I wrote from your second story window. I was nervous and bored. I was lying on the floor. And this song I wrote from your second story window. In-between in-betweens like a whisper from a scream. This is the song I wrote. Where were you? Who is he? This is the song I wrote from your second story window. I was trapped between floors and the drywall and the boards. And this song I wrote from your second story window. In-between in-betweens like a river from a stream. This is the song I wrote from your second story window (Where were you? Who is he?)

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Recorded in 2008.

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released November 11, 2011

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Scott McBride Pensacola

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